Body language. When we talk about non-verbal body language, we pay a lot of attention to facial expressions, eyes and hands, but for some reason our legs are undeservedly offended by us. But in vain!

The further away from the brain a part of the body is, the more difficult it is to control it. If a person can adapt and portray the emotion he needs on his face and more or less control his hands, then everyone forgets about the legs and they give us away with their heads.

"If you're not sure if the person sitting at the table is telling the truth, look under the table."
Allan Pease "The New Body Language"

So let's go through the basic leg poses. Immediately I want to draw your attention to the fact that women and men will have different movements.

traitorous feet

Four basic standing positions

1. Attention

This posture means that you are listening attentively and the interlocutor, most likely, is lower in rank than you. Usually, this is how students stand in front of teachers and subordinates in front of their superiors.

2. Spread legs

This posture is predominantly male. In this position, the man stands firmly on the ground and feels confident.

3. One leg forward

From this position it is very easy to determine the intentions of a person. Usually, in which direction the toe is pointed, in that direction the person intends to move. Being in the company, we will point the sock at the most pleasant interlocutor for us. And if a person feels uncomfortable, then the toe of the exposed leg will most likely be directed to the nearest exit.

4. Crossing the legs

Crossed legs and arms are almost always evidence that a person has closed himself off from everyone and has entered a protective pose. It is quite difficult to reach such a person and it is unlikely that he will easily accept your arguments.

Also, this pose is usually taken in a society of unfamiliar people. You can conduct an interesting experiment - approach a group of strangers and stand next to them in a defensive pose. Almost immediately after that, people will begin to cross their arms one by one. This posture is highly contagious and conveys a certain unease and sense of danger.

Frozen or defensive?

It is always necessary to interpret body language in context. Sometimes people justify their crossed arms and legs by saying that they are cold or want to go to the bathroom. In some cases, this is true, and in some they are just hiding behind a convenient explanation.

In fact, if a person is really cold, he will not only cross his arms, but also hide his fingers under his armpits, and not just wrap them around his elbows. We also cross our legs, but at the same time we try to straighten them and press them tightly against each other. The defensive posture is more relaxed and calm.

If a person says that it’s just convenient for him to stand, most likely he almost always feels as if there are only enemies around.

"American Four"

This posture is for men. A person sitting in such a position is perceived not only as more powerful and energetic, but also as younger. A person sitting in this position is likely to consider himself superior to you and is unlikely to immediately agree with your point of view.

If, having taken this position, a person also secures the raised leg with his hands, this means that she is determined to stand her ground and will in every possible way resist pressure from outside.

Research has shown that most people make their final decision when both feet are firmly planted on the ground. So do not rush your interlocutor to make a decision if one of his soles does not touch the floor.

Ankle crossing

Crossed ankles indicate that your interlocutor is suppressing negative emotions and disagreement and is trying to cope with them. This gesture can be equated with biting the lip.
Usually people sit like this at the reception of dentists, lawyers and tax inspectors.

short skirt syndrome

Usually girls who wear mini skirts sit like this. Despite their length, they give women an impregnable and not very friendly look, since you have to sit all the time, tightly squeezing your legs. People subconsciously interpret this gesture as negative, and treat the interlocutor with caution.

Leg interlacing

This is a purely feminine gesture. Usually modest and insecure girls twist their legs this way. It is unlikely that a strong pressure will fit here. In order to talk to such a person, you need to be open and friendly.

Parallelism

Looking at this picture, I immediately remember "Basic Instinct" and Sharon Stone sitting in a chair. This fit is considered very feminine and 86% of men found it the most attractive. This is how models are taught to sit.

Right foot forward, right foot back

Man is given legs to perform two basic actions - to catch up with prey and run away from danger. If a person is interested in you, during the conversation he will put his right foot forward (a left-hander will most likely put his left foot) in order to close the distance between you. If he is not in the mood for a conversation, then most likely he will put his right foot back, as if preparing for a retreat.

And the last! Tip for business ladies - do not cross your legs in business meetings if you are wearing a skirt that opens your hips. The sight of women's thighs can excite almost any man. As a result, he will remember your hips, but not the topic of the conversation.

And men should be more restrained and not fall apart on chairs, spreading their legs in different directions. A restrained pose with knees together would be more appropriate.

Based on the book by Barbara and Alan Pease “The New Body Language. Extended Version»

Miscellaneous

Bless, father!
1. Why is it forbidden to cross arms and legs in church? Sometimes, when you're tired, you want to cross your arms, but everyone says you can't!
2. I read in your questions that if you live in prodigal cohabitation, then it makes no sense to ask God for help, because you are asking for help in sin. Is it possible to ask, at least in your own words, that this cohabitation should stop and end with a wedding and a wedding? Will God help? What about prayers?
3. Father, I suffer from constant anger, rudeness. I can't do anything with myself! When I want to be rude, I read (not always, rage sometimes fills my brain) the Jesus Prayer, but I still raise my voice, I say offensive! Tell me, please, what prayers should I read to get rid of this?
4. My entire family is unbelieving. Tell me what kind of prayers to pray for them?
Thank you for your work!

1. You can cross your arms, but sitting cross-legged in a temple is indecent.
2. Yes, you can ask, and not only in your own words.
3. Watch your heart, and when you lose peace in it, immediately pray until everything calms down there.
4. Pray as usual and in your own words for their correction. And thank you, God bless you!

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Many of us cross our legs when we sit down, and do so almost automatically. In this position, we seem more elegant and sexy, and it is often called "feminine." We accept this position of the body without hesitation, but only a few know what serious consequences this can lead to.

Although the woman in the photo above looks very attractive to most people due to the way she sits, it is still necessary for everyone to know what happens to the body when a person takes a long time in a cross-legged position:

• The tendency to stay in this position for hours can lead to such an unpleasant disease as peroneal nerve palsy or just paralysis. The same applies when you sit in the same position for a long period of time. It turns out that the posture that causes such health complications is the usual crossing of the legs.
• Back in 2010, numerous studies proved that sitting cross-legged for a long time causes an increase in blood pressure. Even if you have never had blood pressure problems, avoiding sitting in this position will help you become healthier and avoid circulation problems.

The reason for high blood pressure is that when you put one foot on the knee of the other leg, and more blood flows to the heart, resulting in a pressure surge. Another possible explanation is that the pressure rises as a result of isometric contraction of the leg muscles (this occurs when the joints do not move and the muscles do not change their length). This is why crossing the legs at the ankles does not have the same effect as crossing one leg over the other.

• This body posture can also lead to problems with the pelvic muscles. Crossing the legs for long periods of time makes the inner thigh muscles shorter and the outer thigh muscles longer, putting the joints at risk of misalignment.
• The habit of putting your legs crosswise increases the chances of getting varicose veins on your legs. Despite the fact that varicose veins in most cases are inherited, frequent crossing of the legs can cause inflammation of the pinched veins. There are tiny valves in blood vessels that prevent blood from flowing in the wrong direction. When the legs are crossed, the pressure in the veins increases and this prevents normal blood flow, causing narrowing and weakening of the elasticity of the vessel walls. As a result, the blood thickens and the veins in the legs swell.

Finally, studies show that sitting cross-legged for more than 3 hours a day can lead to slouching, lower back and neck pain, and hip discomfort.

Thus, we have given you some food for thought, and now you can give up this habit once and for all to avoid chronic health problems. Be sure that the next time you catch yourself crossing your legs, you will immediately stop doing it!

Almost everyone consciously or unconsciously crosses their legs, because it is familiar, convenient, effective, because otherwise the legs will move apart or you want to relieve pressure from the foot, and sometimes for no reason at all. So is it bad for health?

Doctors often tell us to stop crossing our legs because if we cross our legs, the blood pressure rises a little. Some even know how to use this fact to prevent an approaching faint. However, while increased blood pressure is unhealthy, there is no evidence that blood pressure remains consistently high due to crossing legs.

Varicose veins are another reason why we are told not to cross our legs. Unsightly swollen veins are the result of damage to the valves of blood vessels, which normally help blood flow in one direction: back to the heart. With varicose veins, some blood flows back into the small superficial veins, which swell due to the extra pressure.

Varicose veins are more typical for women, especially (more than once) giving birth and at an older age. Crossing your legs may only draw attention to this problem, but not lead to it.

There is also a theory (mainly among chiropractors) that crossing the legs is the cause of poor posture, and thus back and pelvic pain. Of course, if a person has back or hip problems, he may feel discomfort in this position. Try it for yourself, and you may feel the back muscles tense slightly. If there is some inflammation in this area, it's not hard to see why crossing your legs can be problematic.

A causal relationship, however, has not been established, and it may be that prolonged sitting in an uncomfortable chair is more detrimental than how we position our legs to cope with the discomfort. According to some reports, crossing the legs can even reduce tension in the abdominal muscles and increase joint stability, which in some cases can be beneficial.

Prolonged pressure on the (peroneal) nerve that runs along the outside of the knee can sometimes cause foot numbness when crossed. This is not dangerous and not a sign of impending paralysis - usually, everything returns to normal after a few seconds. Some people need a little more time - up to several minutes.

In very rare cases, prolonged and/or habitual crossing of the legs can cause nerve damage, which is probably more due to a particular predisposition than to the habit itself.

In men, crossing the legs in trousers increases the temperature in the groin. This fact has led to the suggestion that future fathers should not cross their legs (or, for the same reason, wear tight underwear and place a laptop on their laps).

However, in order to have any significant effect on sperm, you need to keep your legs crossed for many hours in a row every day. In addition, many men are more likely to cross their legs, putting the shin of one leg on the knee of the other ("American four"), and in this way unwanted pressure is reduced.

Crossing your legs has long been associated with etiquette and morality. In some countries and cultures, this posture is seen as casual, disrespectful, and by and large a sign of lower class. For the same reasons, in many traditional religions, crossing the legs in church is discouraged. And what is good for the soul should be good for the feet.

However, if you do not think about godliness and respect, you are unlikely to harm yourself in the long run by crossing your legs. The root cause of problems is the very fact that you are sitting, so don't get comfortable, stand up and

This story took place in the early 2000s. At that time, I had just graduated from the university and got a job as an accountant in a trucking company.

In the commercial department of this company, Natasha S. worked - an extremely beautiful 25-year-old girl. We began to communicate well. Almost every day she went into the accounting department and told something.

I have noticed before that Natasha likes to stand cross-legged. Perhaps, from the outside, such a pose would seem to someone with a pent-up desire to go a little. But in the office, everyone was used to the fact that she just had such a manner of conducting a conversation and did not attach any importance to it.

Once Natasha came excited. She said that she was standing in the middle of the street and dialing an SMS message on her phone. Suddenly, a swarthy-faced woman approached her and, looking at her legs in a crosswise pose, said with regret literally the following: “Why are you putting an end to your fate? Don’t you understand that you are depriving yourself of the future?!” And without waiting for an answer, the mysterious stranger went on.

Natasha lamented that all attempts to fight her stable habit were unsuccessful. As soon as she is distracted, forgotten - as she again finds herself standing cross-legged. And it's such a bad omen...

By the way, psychologists who study body language interpret such a pose as evidence of a person’s closeness and unwillingness to communicate. Most often it is observed in combination with arms crossed on the chest and is called the defensive position. But in the case of Natasha, I did not notice that she crossed her arms. Only legs.

Unfortunately, Natasha's fate was tragic. In 2002, I quit that company. Outside of work, our communication gradually faded away. And two years later, through mutual friends, I found out that Natasha had died. The car in which she was traveling with her boyfriend was shot at point-blank range from a firearm. The young man was connected with criminals, he died on the spot, and Natasha died in intensive care ...